Poprocks & Coke.

I decided I want to take Cate and Mouse to the next Green Day show I go to. I know out of my friends their the only ones that will understand how big a deal it is for me to actually bring people with me. I know they'd both be blown away because until you've experienced a show of their magnitude you dont really understand what Im talking about. I just really miss the two of them and want to share something important to me with them. Plus I know Ill get them to the barrier and it'll be something they've never experienced and wont forget.

Like its such a big event and party that gets you all wrapped up that you forget where you are...for me at least. But to me this is a big step. The only person thats seen me truly happy to that extent is Blaine when I met Billie. It kind of is the last shred of who I am, the very core of me comes out when it comes to Green Day. And I only share that last piece if your really close to my heart.

To be totally honest I've seen a lot of shows. I've seen Foo Fighters. Eric Clapton and Roger Daltrey. Paul McCartney! Im going to see The Eagles and Roger Waters. And honestly, Green Day is still the best show to me. And Im not just saying that, its truly different. Their is something about how interactive they are with the crowd, it makes me feel something I cant even put into word. Even my mom said shes never seen a show like that and how intimate it was...and shes seen The fuckin Who! If im being completely honest, Jesus Christ himself could throw a concert and I think Id still be like, "Eh, Green Day was better." Okay yeah theirs alot of people that would get offended by that statement, but know if its coming from me, its true.

For some reason everytime I see how many times ToniAnn has met Green Day I like...dont feel like a good enough fan. Like she went to Cali and did the exact trip I dream of! She went to Pinole and John Swett where Billie went to both high schools. She went to Gilman, and Christie Road. Where Billie had singing lessons and took a photo with his Look For Love tshirt. Tightwad Hill, Stuart and the Ave. She had every meal at Cant Fail Cafe. Adriennes clothing store, the Berkeley Marina. She saw their last two shows in America, including their Homecoming show in San Fran. Shes in official band photos from tour on stage with them! I just feel so pathetic and insignificant, almost like I should be so much better...I just feel down on myself. But then again...shes also met the Jonas Fucks a few times...that kind of makes me want to vomit. I am so envious, I could go to hell right now.

I also decided to nix the idea about the Peacemaker artwork on my side...for now. I think with my tight cash, but exceeding need to get another tattoo dedicated to my boys I have to put that one on the back burner. And instead get "If my memory serves me right, Ill never turn back time" going around my wrist. Obviously it'll be a smaller font and if it still doesn't fit Ill have to cut off the second line...or maybe just get the word "Whatsername" on my inner wrist. Either way. That song has always been one for me that like, reached inside my brain and soul...I dont want to particularly tell what that song has truly done for me. But I think its time to pay homage to that one next. Plus I decided to redesign my Peacemaker tattoo and I have to decide on the perfect location I want to get it, which may take time.

I honestly have no idea where I would be in this moment without Green Day. Its kind of ridiculous.