I want the truth.

I want the truth from you

Give me the truth, even if it hurts me

I want the truth from you

Give me the truth, even if it hurts me

I know that this will break me

I know that this might make me cry

You gotta say what’s on your mind, on your mind

I know that this will hurt me

And break my heart and soul inside

I don’t wanna live this lie

-GC

Open Your Eyes.

Color my world, dear.
Give me something new to discover.
Show me something Ive never seen before.
I want an experience
Let me in
To your universe
I want to see things from your eyes.
I just want to be with you
In the front seat of your car
Take me anywhere
I don't care
We could be the ones who make it
Yeah we could be the ones that make it out
Alive.

Love Buzz

Ok.

So heres how it is.

I want to be with you forever.

And I dont mean the petty bullshit high school version of forever.

I mean I cant picture my life now that youve come into it.

I want you.

I want to have money problems with you.

And hang up old photos on our walls.

I want to laugh about the times were living right now, in 40 years.

I want to travel the world with you.

I want you to be the last person I see before I close my eyes

And the first face I see when I open them again.

And everything in between.

I want you to be who I argue with over which couch we put in the living room.

I want to watch pens games and steeler games with you.

I love you, more than I can even begin to explain.

Ive figured out I cant change your past, but I want to change your future.

I want to be apart of it.

But only if you want me to be.

"When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. "

Dont Let Me Down.

I'm tired of peoples empty promises.
Its to the point where I don't even get my hopes up, I just assume...

yeah, another empty promise.

People shouldn't make promises.

Because life changes. Circumstances...change.

Feelings, change.

Nothing is guranteed.

I'm about to sound like an over confident bitch probably but

I keep my promises.

If I tell someone that I will do something for them 9.5 chances out of 10

I fucking do it.

And if I dont, its because the person changes their mind.

I don't see whats so hard about it, you just make the promises you know you can keep.

Instead of getting peoples hopes up.

To be completely honest I'm begining to get tired of being let down.

Maybe I just expect to much of people.

Maybe I just need to lower my standards.

Maybe I just need to not hold my breath.

Because it always seems like people never remember the promises they make,

to me.

The sweetness.

When I signed on to my blog...my hands were literally shaking with anger.


I was pissed beyond belief. And totally ready to rant and ramble about how I didnt need anybody, and that a person was being a hypocrite. Saying they wanted to spend time with me more...but apparently no one else could at the same time...whatever. Along with the fact I basically had the worst day of my life and I couldnt even depend on my "friends" to make me feel better.

Thats all insignificant now. Every. Damn. Bit of it.

I glanced down to see one of my "followers" had updated their blog...so...I read it. Cus their one of my most favorite people.


Their blog made everything that happended all day go away. I dont know why but...just reading it, made me feel like I mattered to someone.


This persons probably reading this now...and I just wanted them to know I love them. And that they always find a way to make me smile [especially when I dont want to] and I dont know what Id do without them.


You dont even know...you made me feel better without even knowing, or trying for that matter. You're my best friend.

I needed that today.
Thank you.

You are not spiderman!

I was a going through my computer today.
I stumbled across this.
It literally made me laugh for a good 10 minutes.

Hah. Good times.

Spinning lights, don't be scared.

You will always be my constantine.

My perfect brand of nicotine

My reason for breathing.

When the room keeps spinning.

I close my eyes.

And feel your skin.

Memories.

Im all locked in.

Im afraid to answer the telephone.
Because I know that Itll never be you.
Theres hope in the air.
But I dont seem to care.
Please dont think that this was easy.
I think it was the toughest thing since phasing.

Its time for me to move on.

Time for me to move on.

To something better than this.

Nothing could be better than this.

So I want to find out together.

We could be the kids who get out alive.

All those nights we talked.

Paid off.

Yeah im still in debt.

Its impossible for anyone to hurt me

Like you do.

Like you did.

[I dont know when I wrote this, its a little older.]

Love is a Mixtape.

Not that long ago one of my best friends gave me a book entitled Love is a Mix tape. I haven't exactly had an immense amount of time to read it, but Ive been picking it up off and on since its been passed to me.

Today I read two chapters.

In the book the main character, Rob [hes kind of introverted. lives his life through his headphones and kind of just sits back and watches the lives of others through his window.] falls in love with a girl name Renee.

I wish I could be her. She is this indie kinda girl but is a music lover. But she has this amazing mind I only have in my dreams.

Although I realize I am a Rob. Sitting back. Idle. Kind of alone.

In the book these quotes literally captivated me : "I could already tell there were things happening deep inside me that were irreversible. Is there any scarier word than irreversible? Its a hiss of a word full of side effects and mutilations. Severe tire damage - no backing up."

"I felt strange things going on inside me, and I knew the these weren't things I would recover from. These were changes that were shaping the way things were going to be, and I wouldn't find out until later. Irreversible. "

I know this feeling. The point of no return in a relationship. You can feel it morph you into something completely different than what you've known yourself to be.

Sometimes its good. Sometimes its heartbreaking. Sometimes its terrible.

But its always life changing.

I just thought it was an ironic and somewhat great time to read this chapter.

At this point in my life at least.

I love you's not enough, im lost for words.

Love.

People throw the word around so losely they dont even know what it means anymore.

After its said so many times, it loses any meaning. Any feeling.

You say it so much it doesnt even feel like a word anymore [I forget where I heard that from, but I felt something for it.]

Back to what I was saying.

I know people who have been saying that they were in love since the 6th grade.

Im not neccesarily saying that you cant be in love that young.
On the contrary I think young love is actually more common. Its more pure and true. Innocent love.

I just mean people confuse a real liking for someone as love.

Sometimes it doesnt take that long to figure out that you love someone but people doubt it because its happening to quickly.

I disagree with this as well. I think if you feel a strong connection with someone and you feel comfortable with them, and trust them whole heartedly then you can easily fall in love.

Being in love with someone brings many emotions.

When you love someone you have those over the moon, cant stop thinking about them, smile when you hear their voice in your head, dream of being with them kind of feeling...the kind of thing where even when your not with them you can smell them on you.

When you would do anything to make them happy, even if it meant you wouldnt get to be.

To sacrifice yourself, your heart and your trust to them and its all worth it.

Im getting off topic again. My apologies.

Youd never know what my point was. But, the point is the word love is overused and has been abused.

So I dont want to say it, no matter how much I feel it.

Love is just as much showing an action as it is saying the words.

And I dont want to say love. I want to show it.

I want to prove it.